POSTED: September 24th, 2010
My life was so much more rewarding when Yellowcard was relevant.
I don’t really know what’s with these last few days that we’ll refer to as “lately,” but lately, things have not been rewarding.
Maybe it’s that some guy in one of my classes turned in a piece made of grass on Tuesday. It wasn’t even innovative, like thumb-sized Eiffel towers woven from the remains of Sunday’s mow. It was literally just a few handfuls of grass, hot glued to wood. And it was praised. It was praised. Do you have any idea what it’s like to watch people swoon over a smaller sample of what is already in their front yard? It was in that moment that I realized that Art School Confidential is not just a movie. It is my life.
Maybe it’s that all week I thought about how I really wanted to do something fun this weekend and when yesterday rolled around, I still had no plans. So I text messaged eight people, including my dad. Including my dad. No one texted me back. It’s been twenty-four hours, which is like four lunar landings in text time. It was in that moment that I realized Girls Just Wanna Have Fun (and not the original that makes you want to pop in a work-out DVD, but the Greg Laswell cover, the one that makes you feel like you will never have a day of fun in your entire life ever again and will actually be dying shortly) is not just a song. It is my life.
Or maybe it’s that the length of my hair is really starting to freak me out.
I used to have really long hair, full of volume and shine and sparkles. It didn’t even need shampoo because it already had everything a shampoo bottle could legally promise to deliver. And then I cut it. I cut it really short because I am an idiot. This isn’t the problem. Short hair is fine. The problem is that I don’t think anyone over 35 should have hair past their waist. It makes women look creepy because they look 16 from the back (and then, in comparison, 60 from the front) and men look like Halloween costumes. I’m sorry. It’s true. Even if you’re Cher. Maybe even especially if you’re Cher.
This isn’t an immediate problem, because 35 is still a little more than a decade away for me. But. If I ever want long hair again, it needs to happen now. My hair is currently an inch longer than my chin. At the rate my hair grows combined with the rate that I change my mind about whether or not Operation: Grow Out Hair and Project: Ignore Awkward Hair Length and DO NOT CUT are a go, my hair will probably not reach my intended goal until I am 28 (best-case scenario) or 29 (realistic scenario) or 30 (hold me). This leaves me with only five to seven years to actually have the length of hair I want.
(By the way, it’s really a slippery slope when you start breaking time down into easily imaginable intervals, because 80 years sounds like forever. “You are going to live for 80 years.” Inconceivable! “You are going to live for ten years, eight times in a row.” Um, what?)
And it was in that moment that I realized life needs to slow the fuck down. It also needs to slow down because the other day I overheard someone saying that they were going to party like it was 1995 and 1995 was fifteen years ago.
All I’m saying is that when Ocean Avenue came out, none of these things were a problem. I wasn’t an art student then. My dad didn’t comprehend the value of a prompt text and was still a little hazy about the entire concept of texting, so I wouldn’t have expected him to text me back. I had good hair.
And 1995 was only eight years ago.
Well atleast you have 8 people to send a text to? Doing better than me.
And up until a little over a year ago when I decided I needed a mohawk, I had wonderful hair too, now I am stuck in some awkward phase trying to make it grow faster.
Now to listen to some Yellowcard
reply by shelly:
September 26th, 2010 at 10:06 am
it took me two years to grow my hair out from my mohawk. sometimes i wonder why i didn’t keep the short hair it was sooo easy
reply by Brittany:
September 26th, 2010 at 11:04 am
As it gets more awkward and requires washing much more often I wonder why I am still dealing with it, and fighting the urge to chop it all off again.
I wish I had the money for wigs, because I would definitely just shave my head again and wear wigs forever.
Fear not, your hair will grow. I cut my hair to the skull three years ago and now it’s already past my shoulders. I should eventually have it long-long.
And yeah, art school is full of poseurs trying to disguise themselves in with the talented people. You should watch Ghost World.
I am not sure why, but I think this is my favorite Filleosophy entry so far. It seems like art school would be mostly filled with self-righteous yuppies who spend the majority of their time drinking expensive sugar flavored coffee and thinking of a possible meaning to their recent “project.”
“I call this one ‘Sawlitude.’ Notice how Jigsaw is surrounded by nothing but empty space which represents his loneliness and distance from the world. Disregard the fact that I’m an uncreative fuck who just drew a picture of a tiny man riding a tricycle on white paper.”
I had chin length hair… and it took me almost two years to get it just past my shoulders. Sigh.
Extensions… Y/N?
You know. You’re seriously right, life should seriously slow down. It’s too fast now even for me.
Thank god I’m in love with my short hair.. and I love your blog. I’m an addict.
Existencial crisis in 3, 2, 1…
oh my god. life really WAS much easier when all that mattered was pop punk shows and kissing cute boys.
except then I cut my hair super short and that sucked. now it’s long again, but I need more pop punk.
what the fuck, life?
I chopped my hair short a few years ago (it was a disaster), then let it grow back out (it took forever, and it looked awful in between), and now it’s finally long enough again but I’m terrified to even get the smallest trim. I’ll probably end up being one of those creepy middle-aged women with long hair.
After the great post-breakup hacking off at age 20 and again at 21 after pink faded to a stubborn orange/yellow, I came to the conclusion that save for split ends, haircuts are always a bad idea. Anything shorter than nipple length is horrendous on me. A few more months to go on that. Laying off hairdye helped immensely. I’m planning on being creepy for life like Kristen McMenamy.
I wish that I had discovered Jawbreaker, Cap’n Jazz, and other such revered pop-punk, proto-emo, whiny 20something male acts at a more developmentally appropriate age like when I thought I was too cool for that stuff (not) and instead listened to the latest or most obscure limpdick indie rock garbage. I recently deleted all that stuff because I can’t deal with it anymore. The exception being that first Alkaline Trio album — that one you’ll have to pry that one from my cold, lifeless hands.
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